Sexual Healing: Cannabis, Masturbation, and Coping with Depression


Can Sex Heal? Does Cannabis Help?

It’s not fair how society stigmatizes the best things in life.

Self-love may be the most critical element in realizing that you can still hold happiness in your own life: even if only for a few precious moments of reprieve. We interviewed, “Ophelia” who exposed her own personal challenges, her daily struggles with depression, and her deeply satisfying use of cannabis and masturbation to cope. 

Goodleaf: What made you choose the name "Ophelia's Orgasms for your blog? (I noted the Shakespearian reference to Hamlet).

Ophelia: You’re correct about the Hamlet reference! I feel that several things about her character resonate with me: like her relationship with her father, going mad after his death, and possibly killing herself over it. I’m extremely close with my father, and I’ve always lived in fear of losing him. I actually majored in Laboratory Science. Truth be told, I’ve just always loved the name Ophelia.

And the orgasms? You’ll get to hear all about them.

Goodleaf: Can you briefly describe your experience of depression before introducing cannabis?

Ophelia: It really began in fourth grade for me when I grieved the deaths of my grandfather and my best friend within two months of each other. I was frequently ridiculed in school growing up, and was molested by a classmate in seventh grade, so my self-image was completely destroyed. I fit in better in high school, but had an extremely difficult and unhealthy relationship with my mother, which exacerbated my depression and resulted in me cutting my wrists secretively as a coping mechanism. I stopped abruptly when my mother discovered it after a couple of years later, but I’m not sure the urge to still do it will ever go away. Right before I met my husband at 26, I hit rock bottom and tried anti-depressants. Needless to say, pills that eviscerate your sex drive did not last very long for me. That’s where my story with marijuana begins.

Goodleaf: Would you say that cannabis is a more effective means to cope with depression than alcohol?

Ophelia: Absolutely. Alcohol is a chemical depressant — it increases the release of dopamine to the reward center of your brain, which tricks you into feeling better. This causes you to drink more to release more dopamine, but it’s actually enhancing the feelings of depression that follow shortly afterwards. In my experience, alcohol has the tendency to turn me into someone I’m not, (and I do not like being out of control). I’ve experienced some of the most profound anger when I’ve been drunk, and sometimes it’s been over nothing. It’s too unpredictable — it can make you feel euphoric — or it can convince you to blow your brains out.

I am completely in control of my faculties when I’m high, and I’m guaranteed euphoria every hit, every day. It’s an instant feeling of serenity that consumes me and allows me to sit back and put things in perspective. I like to refer to it as “getting reasonable.”

Goodleaf: And, how does cannabis alter the rapture of masturbation? Is it better than alcohol?

Ophelia: To quote the good Jon Stewart, “You ever see the back of a $20 bill . . . on weed?” Nearly every activity can be made better with cannabis (I do a lot of research!), and it’s much more enjoyable than alcohol. Masturbation or sex while drunk is usually a frustrating task. You end up going numb and find yourself chasing an orgasm amidst trying not to vomit.

"Being high gave me the ability to disconnect from my reality and focus only on exploring the playground between my legs."

However, on weed, I have the capability to direct my focus and thoughts to any idea or sensation I choose, and sometimes I climax partially because I thought myself into it. I feel that you have to personally experiment with it to see what you can unlock within yourself. I didn’t realize the mind-blowing potential weed has until about a year and a half ago when a special, new toy came into my life. I ended up spending hours in bed exhausting myself with so many orgasms that I’d wake up sore the next day from pulling muscles in ecstasy. Being high gave me the ability to disconnect from my reality and focus only on exploring the playground between my legs.

Goodleaf: In your blog you mention a "depletion of self-confidence." Is it fair to suggest that cannabis gives you a confidence boost that helps you cope with life?

Ophelia: While I do feel that cannabis allows me to be disjointed from my “normal” brain, and almost enter an alternate reality where I do feel more dominant, confident, and sexy, it’s not something that has made me a tougher person overall, unfortunately. However, it does give me the mood boost that I think everyone who has depression or anxiety is looking to achieve when they can’t get out of their own heads, and I don’t have to put something synthetic in my body. It’s kind of like a “power-up.” Like I said, I call it “getting reasonable.” I’m the first to admit that sometimes I don’t have complete control of my brain and its sentiments, and I imagine I’m quite unreasonable sometimes. When I smoke, I’m flooded with happiness, and whatever’s bothering me disappears.

Goodleaf: Can you talk about mental health matters within your own family?

Ophelia: My father was given up for adoption at birth and lived his life in loveless orphanages and foster homes where he worked and was treated like a little slave. He has had an incredibly burdensome life, and has subsequently fallen victim to lifelong depression, which seemingly was passed down to all of his children. My half-brother took his life in 2001, and my sister and I have struggled off and on with depression too. Even my mother became depressed in her mid-50s after never being able to understand my father’s condition for so many years. My dad and I talk about our anxiety and sadness occasionally, but it always makes me more depressed, truthfully.

Goodleaf: Can sex heal? (Self-love, masturbation, and recovering from mental injuries)

Ophelia: I think sex can heal, definitely. Physically, during an orgasm, the genitals flood the brain with information from millions of nerve endings, with a surge of neurochemicals such as oxytocin. Oxytocin is also known as the “cuddle hormone,” which is responsible for that intimate feeling you get during and after sex. Additionally, the lateral orbitofrontal cortex in our brain shuts down during orgasm, so we completely lose control temporarily. Sometimes just letting go for a moment is all you need. Neurologically, orgasms literally make you feel better.

"Neurologically, orgasms literally make you feel better."

Also, I know that my self-explorations with weed have really enhanced my sex life with my husband. Not only can we talk about my little adventures as foreplay, I’ve also learned quite a bit about what I like and how to make my orgasms more intense — which makes me a happier person. I also think that being intimate with someone really boosts your self-confidence. 

Goodleaf: So, how does it feel to climax while high?

Ophelia: Well, for the sake of authenticity, I took a little “break” before answering this question.

It’s a little like laying on the beach on a comfortably warm day with the sun kissing your face and a cold, crisp breeze that keeps your senses keen and alert. I’ve discovered how to use my mind and body to make me orgasm countless times, and I’ve learned how to drag out the feeling of the orgasm for minutes instead of fleeting seconds by using my new toy. And the kicker is that the best orgasm is actually the third or fourth one in — I sometimes can’t believe the explosion that erupts from inside me. When I climax high, my entire body is thrust forward with a surge, and there is a roar inside me that pulsates for as long as I desire. Sometimes I can’t even hold back the screams. Climaxing while high disconnects you from any reality you know and allows you to feel every wave of pleasure that throbbing inside of you. 

Goodleaf: Do you reach a deeper (spiritual?) connection to your partner if you're enjoying sex while high?

Ophelia: I definitely think you can enhance your connection with your partner with weed. When my husband and I have sex high, I find that every sensation is so much more intense. But instead of having that flood of sensations en masse, I’m able to select which feeling I want to build an orgasm on: like the anticipation of his mouth finding my nipple for the first time when I’m astride him, or how I can feel my own muscles contracting around him if I move my hips just slowly enough. Being high gives you the opportunity to embark on transcendence together — it’s definitely something spiritual to feel that close to another human being. 

Goodleaf: Does the sex put the depression out of your mind for the whole day — or is sex only a temporary release?

Ophelia: Unfortunately, the “afterglow” you get your first few times ever having sex doesn’t seem to linger through to adulthood unless it was a really stellar session, not even if you were high for it. It’s a temporary high as that burst of neurochemicals is fleeting, especially if you found your way to an orgasm to escape something. Luckily, that’s where cannabis steps in for the rest of the day!

You can read more about Ophelia’s Orgasms here.

Life is hard — love yourself — treat yourself

Cannabis and sex are becoming a hot topic in the rising cannabis culture. The female personal lubricant, “Foria” is another option for anyone looking to experiment with topical lotions infused with cannabis.

One personal testimonial for the new product stated: “I wanted to see if I could get high through my vagina. I think I did, but it was pretty mild.” Overall, “our bodies were looser and more relaxed. I recall having a screaming orgasm that time.” One thing to keep in mind if you’re looking to experiment with Foria: it is oil based, and as such is incompatible with latex condoms. Oils will deteriorate latex. If condoms are necessary, use non-latex ones.

However you choose to experiment with cannabis during sex — be safe, have fun, and embrace self-love.

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Jesse Richard
Jesse Richard

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